Back to School Meme

So Wee Shiong tagged me for this meme. I am obliged to do it-loh. I guess I had a pretty interesting path in schooling thus far. Had my share of unforgettable fun times and eeky, down times. I scrunched my brain hard to revisit my old memories of school. Read on, if you dare.

How many schools did you go to?

Err… One kindergarten, Two primary schools, One secondary school. One junior college. *counts using fingers* So that makes FIVE.

Can you believe it? I did not cry during my first day of kindy. My mum attests to that incident. I figure it was because she threatened I will not get MILO during recess if I was a crybaby. Back then, I won’t drink anything if it wasn’t MILO or some carbonated, bad-for-your-teeth drink. Recently, one of my kindy-mates passed away in an accident. How fragile life is.

I dug out this kindergarten graduation picture from the deepest depths of the mess that is my room. Guess which one I am? Send me an email.

Then, I started my primary education in Langley, UK. It was called grammar school there. Small school with a healthy mix of various ethnicities. Can’t even remember anything much besides all the Art classes (where I used the walls as my drawing canvas) and running around the fields trying to smack bugs.

A year later, the family moved back here due to dad’s working commitments. So, I started Darjah Dua (Primary 2) at an all-boys’ missionary school with a history so far back our grandparents weren’t even born yet. Man, I had such a culture shock! Everything was in Bahasa Melayu, except English of course. Torturous time trying to pick up the national language. And the local social conventions. Sigh, always kena marah from my cikgu-cikgu for lagak Barat! I managed to scrape through to be admitted to the best class in Primary 3. That was when all hell broke loose. I had a witch for a class-teacher. I totally hated her. Think the feeling was mutual. Even when I was bullied by my classmates, it ended with me being punished. Annus horribilis it was.

I struggled miserably even till Primary 4. My sole refuge was DragonBall Z comicbooks. That year also saw me somehow being admitted into the some odd programme, not PTS! I was being taught advanced stuff like from Primary 5, literature etc. It helped me to be more interested and driven in academia. Progressed in the programme until Primary 6 when dunno how I became the Head Prefect. I was a bad one I think. I fought a few times. Sighs.

I went to the secondary school linked with my primary school, like brother-schools lah. They even had the same school song. It’s still engraved in my brain. Been singing it for more than a decade leh. Oh I remember, sometime in Form 1, having my English essay being read out in class and the teacher even asked my classmates to COPY the whole essay. My pride ballooned nonetheless. I had crazy male teachers in Form 2. One would punish students by pinching their groin area. Another would teach us SPM Sejarah instead of PMR. The funniest one would be my Geography teacher who only gave us a grand total of 5 pages of notes-homework the whole year. Spent most of his lessons, giving us Sexual Education talks. He even introduced things like condoms, lubricant and cockrings! *gasp* Slightly disturbing character uh?

Form 5 was the BESTEST schooling-year EVER. Did not care too much about grades. Just prioritised on having fun all the time, being in a group of hedonistic psychos. Free periods always meant PJ (Pendidikan Jasmani/Physical Education). When the relief teacher came in, the whole class would cheer, “PJ! PJ! PJ!” We got our way 95% of the time as this meant free time for the teacher too. We were a bunch of self-conceited, over-confident dudes. Our Add Maths teacher walked out of the class a month before SPM, because he can’t stand our ignorance. (I think I need to make another entry just on Form 5 itself. Haha) Still very tight with my Form 5 friends, even till today. Brothers for life, katakan.
Pre-U was the worst phase of my education journey. I survived. Enough said.

Was I the studious nerd or the last minute hero?

Always last minute. Diligence at the eleventh hour is the best (easiest) policy. I guess I was one of those who paid attention in class but I usually forget the things taught once the teachers leave the class. Studying was never in my daily list of things-to-do until exams were around the corner. Sleeping was, still is.

Strangely, I managed to be an A student most of the time. I can’t believe it sometimes.

Was I the class 'taiko' or the teachers' pet?

The teachers’ pet, without a doubt. Hardly got caught red-handed for misdemeanour. Above average grades. Answered questions readily. Punctual in handing in homework. Never chit-chatted when teachers were looking. Never said “no” when being summoned to be teachers’ coolie, albeit at times disgruntled. One of the most ridiculous requests was to start the car engine so that the air-conditioning will begin running for my Physics teacher (how this lady bullies me deserves a whole entry).

I just had to be a good student. My mum headed the PTA. She visited the school on a regular basis and like befriended the whole staff room. Or from my perspective, recruited a company of spies. Mummy dearest constantly reminded them that she has issued the permit to whack me if I ever went out of line. As per usual, teachers talk and gossip. I think the “spies” update my mum as she perennially hinted about school stuff. I will never know. But once (that I know of), they called my mum; thinking I was kidnapped as I was MIA (was in school lah)!

What was the biggest rule I broke in school?

Skipping class. Skipping school. Skipping assembly. (I have to do this for *** society/club/board lah, teacher. Urgent one!) Eating in class. “Loaned” library books without expiry date. Playing football/basketball/volleyball/cards in class. Sleeping in class. Throw foodwaste on some annoying prefect’s car. “Extended recess” in the Scouts’ Den. Singing in class (I was the ubiquitous class karaoke-machine!) Sneaked out of school to buy McDonalds/Dim Sum. Bribed teacher to safeguard forbidden stuffs from being confiscated.

I was a bad, bad boy.

Yes, I even periodically brought my friends to the AV room to watch Astro during lessons. No porn, unlike Will though.

“You haven’t done anything wrong, until you get caught.”

Oh, I just remembered. I once locked a classmate in a toilet cubicle. Just for fun. He ratted on me to the teacher. Pn. Salmah believed in my innocent eyes instead. I was quite the little devil, even at only 8 years of age.

Take your pick at my (not exhaustive) list of delinquent behaviour.

Three subjects I enjoyed the most.

English. Like duh! And I reckon my English teachers did nurture my inclination for Literature. My English classes were never really about dissecting the 8 parts of speech. But we learnt it through stories, videos, newspapers, poetry and ACTUAL practical usage of the language. English was the only way I could express my innermost self.

Chemistry. As much as I am a fan of all the Sciences, Chemistry appealed to me the most. It required less memory work than Biology and made more sense than Physics. But we all know that Biology is essentially Chemistry, which is actually Physics, which really is Math.

Economics. Tough but mostly common sense. Showed logic and reason for phenomena like inflation, price hikes blablabla. Improved my financial competency, which is seriously lousy.

Three teachers that inspired me

Mr. Choo. My Form 5 Add Math tutor. Salvaged my consistent D7 grade to a decent A2. Isn’t that enough reason? A nice fella who treated us Pizza Hut parties prior to SPM. Favourite quote, “Life is too short. Cheer up, for soon we will all be dead.”

Ms. Lee HC. Pre-U Chemistry teacher. Somehow she made me see the wonders of Chemistry. Now, I think the subject is like totally dope. She is like a big sister rather than a teacher. I think the best part is that she is down to earth and humble. If she doesn’t know something, she would honestly admit it unlike some teachers who make up facts. Note: She tore my answer script on the first day of class. Scary.

Ms. Sandhi. Form 5 Bahasa Melayu cum Counsellor. I am still in awe as she was the solo teacher who did not need to shout, scream, shout or shriek to command the class. Nor need she use the cane. When Ms. Sandhi talks, everybody listens. Perfect silence. The only time I didn’t feel like learning BM was a drag. She was pretty good at fortune-telling too.

Guess this is where I am to tag people. Erm… cincai-lah
1. Zemien. For old time’s sake.
2. Wormy. You perpetually have tonnes to say about your alma mater.
3. Jasmine. Me godsis.
4. JC. Wondering, cos I know oh-so many people from your school.
5. Anyone who has the free time and wants to.