Wednesday, December 31, 2008

"Damn Those Angmoh Durians!"

WARNING: The video below is a techno? song performed in the Hokkien Dialect. Hilarity ensues.

Durian Sisters (played by May & Choy) performing 行情坏/Bad Times, although I'd think Lousy Economy is a better translation.

Ah wonders of YouTube!

"Damn those Angmoh Durians!" *quoted verbatim from the movie.

HAHAHAHAHA! At the end of this scene (cut off, obviously), they are seen throwing those star-dagger-thingies at their rivals, the Papaya Sisters (the protagonists)!

Okay technically the twins are NOT angmohs and they are obviously lip-syncing poorly but it's so-funny-I-can-die! Which reminds me how much I love the 881 movie lah~! It never fails to entertain. Royston Tan is a genius... Who else can make such a bombastic movie about the getai industry???
Getai = Stage performances usually in season during the Hungry Ghosts Festival or other Chinese-related Deity/God's birthday/Canonisation Day or something...

Hmm, looking at the video... What kinda bottoms are they wearing? Inverted plastic skirts?

I think I shall upload this song into my iPod =P Just to remind myself that I shouldn't spend too much...

Tell me if anybody wants a translation... cos I am kinda lazy to do it now. LOL

Happy New Year again!
2008 has been a blast...

Monday, December 29, 2008

Probably The Last Post of The Year

Gah! All the studying is driving me mad!

Anyways, this is just gonna uber brief.

  1. Christmas Eve was good. Busy busy day, ended with a great dinner at a quaint place with my OTHER family, the friends who made my med school life thus far relatively sane and smooth... and we are notorious as "The English-Speaking-Spoilt-Rich-Kids Gang" LoL
  2. Then we went back home to continue studying. =(
  3. The Christmas long weekend was all about le familia. I love my family. Along with all the drama!
  4. Babysitting my nephew and niece is as effective as a few sessions at the gym. LoL
  5. Ended Saturday, pissed drunk, at a party. That's all I remember of that night.
  6. Discovered that the cufflinks I have longed for actually costs RM55,905 a pair!!!
  7. I have run out of storage space for my ties.
  8. I am having banana leaf rice wayyy too often. [And I just got back from my 4th nasi daun pisang meal in 2 weeks!]
  9. And NO, I don't make New Year resolutions cos I never keep up with them. A few weeks down the road, I will most likely forget all about them.
  10. The only thing I am looking forward to (with a happy mood) in 2009 is seeing my face in PRESTIGE magazine.

Happy New Year y'all!

Mucho love from joshy!

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Paris de Java

Hey people!

I know, I know. It seemed like forever since I last posted anything here and the cyberspace, for that matter. Did you all miss me? Or just didn't notice my absence... lol eitherways I have still tonnes of love to share.

The year is coming to a close. A time where lives are hanging in the balance and we are all going completely bonkers.

Well, the part about losing one's sanity may be exclusively reserved for me.

Gosh, I just sat for the hardest, suckiest exam I have ever encountered in my entire medical school career. Being totally shaken and traumatised, I wasn't very much myself. You know, all the kiss-kiss muah-muah, being totally himbotic in public and cracking lame jokes.

But yeah, the LOTR Symphony with the Malaysian Philharmonic Orchestra (and YKLS and KL Children's Choir) did soften the emotional blow a little bit with great music and a night of dressing-up-to-the-nines and splendour with a late supper at Jalan Alor.

But came Monday, I was feeling all down again (and discouraged, a seriously rare condition for my hyperinflated ego).

And so I called a few of my 'reliably crazy and spontaneous' friends and got ourselves on the next flight available to Bandung, Indonesia.

Despite the fact that I have a HUGE professional exams (determining my life and death!) within 2 weeks and I should be grounded in the library, studying all the stocked books.

Sometimes, what a overworked boy really needs is just a holiday away.

And so I (with my entourage of psycho-shoppers) totally painted the highland-plateau-city red/orange/rainbow with our fabulous antics. For the SECOND time in 5 months!

Shopping frenzy, that is.

I think I maxed out my cards cos they didn't work when I tried to get Duty Free alcohol at the airport. Bummer.

Bandung is very popular as a shopping city among Javanese. Jakartans swarm the city on weekends to shop, shop, shop and shop somemore! Which means the connecting Cipularang expressway will be totally jammed like our NSE during the Chinese New Year season. (Good thing we went there on a weekday!)

Probably that's why they hardly advertise this attraction of Bandung as the city of factory outlets of major international brands. I swear, there could have been like 200 over such shops in the city. Sadly, we only visited almost half of that within the 72 hours :(

And there was ZERO chance we could have purchased any counterfeit products cos The Grecian whose Bible is French Vogue, GQ, Details and the sort; was there to supervise our value buys. Lest we commit the unredeemable sin of purchasing some fake stuffs or worse, *gasp* OFF-SEASON fashion!

Bandung is also known for the volcano, Tangkuban Perahu... But yeah, we didn't visit it AGAIN. Retail therapy totally distracted us. "The volcano can wait," said The Singaporean.

Since IT IS A RETAIL THERAPY HOLIDAY, very few photographs were taken. But yeah, this is a sampling of what Bandung (aka Paris de Java, as referred by their colonists) was like for lil joshy boi.

Rumah Mode is one of the largest shops with totally elaborate landscaping. It felt more like an amusement park or monument site with the abundance of Hindu-Buddhism-inspired statuettes.

Es Duren... blergh... No thank you! And Es Shanghai is serious NOT for everybody.

BUT OMG I LURVE ES JERUK & TEH SOSRO. And the BATAGOR & SIOMAY outside The Heritage is da bomb!

LoL yup we totally had a buffet on the flight back.Hardly had time to have proper meals the whole time there. We got our set priorities right you know? *winks*

As I return, feeling somewhat rejuvenated from a fruitful shopping trip, all geared up and ready to face the torments of hitting the books, I revel at the thought:

It's actually kinda nice to be sleeping in my own bed again.

Thanks again for my presents (you know who you are). Big smoochies - you rock!

Take care lovelies! Have a Blessed Christmas and a wonderful New Year!

Joshy is going to be spending Christmas and Boxing Day with his family. Lotsa times to stuff up with Mummy's best recipes and quality time with the nephew and niece.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

5 Years Today

'Permanent' by David Cook.

Both of us first met, today, exactly 5 years back... I still remember it almost to crystal-clear perfection. It's really shocking to realise it has been half a decade.

It was at Fort Canning. A mutual friend, T brought D (The Ex, as mentioned in prior post) along for a sightseeing picnic and photography trip. It was a picnic alright, with Coca-cola and Pringles.

A few hours later, I found myself sitting next to him at the Dhoby Ghaut Interchange while waiting for a Red Line train to send me back to Newton. Yes, he was on the same line too; in another direction. We finally started talking. Three hours later, we were still there with a few bucks burnt off our ezlink cards. (SMRT's crazy scheme of having time limits for travels!)

And we hung out the next day. He brought me to his favourite chocolate bar at the Esplanade. (closed down in 2005! Bummer!)

As fate would have it, we ended up in the same JC. Thank goodness we weren't in the same class, or else it might be pretty odd seeing each other for close to 10 hours daily.

We were already chatting on MSN (compared to ICQ back then!) or glued to phone till the wee hours of the morning.

Anyways, we were an item 2 weeks later!

In retrospect, it's pretty hilarious how teensy we were as a couple. We used to write love notes for each other and slipped them into our respective lockers on an almost daily basis. There were times when I found a balloon tied to my locker or when he found his favourite chocolates inside his locker (Okay I hacked in lah, he has this habit of using the same combination for all his locks) among other mushy things.

Not long after, things began to change. Arguments were a daily staple inclusive of the dramatic events (yes, very painful for both of us, I believe!) I figure we were both pretty emo teens back then; me being a dumb 17 year old and he was 16.

We broke up and got back together a few times. Unknowingly, we grew further and further apart. Enter: More emotional tension and a storyline worthy of a Hollywood script. With a pretty ugly climax - the final break-up was a messy one.

We didn't talk for months.

It must have been some miracle or divine intervention cos we started being friends again. Our dynamics worked even better than ever before. From boyfriends to best friends, we grew and matured together.

Throughout the past 5 years, we have each experienced umpteen ups-and-downs and I was his rock and he was my anchor. Haha I wish I could share the traumatic stories, but they are just too damn personal lah.

Argh, I have digressed so much. And this post was supposed to be a short one, within limits of like 300 words max and now I have blabbered on so much.

It's really amazing how our friendship has stood strong against the changing tides of time and distance. Especially, noting how our story unfolded.

It's comforting to know that no matter what happens, he will always be two steps behind. I know he's got my back (when he is not out saving all of humankind!) Of course, I have other fantabulous friends who will also do the same lah, but just focus on him for this post alrighty!

Oh, he is also one of the very few people who I know have zero expectations of me :) That means a lot.

What we have is small but special.

What we share is permanent.

We are permanent.

p.s. I just got a postcard from him! the picture was of Bulls... LOL

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Christmas Care Package From The Ex... and Indulgence!

.....after failing to wake up early in an adventure to visit the neighbourhood Starbucks for free coffee (Read Janvier's post for more info) and possibly get another tumbler. Hey, I drink (coffee) like a fish! *I got the last anniversary tumbler at the outlet!*

Yes I wish to stress on the failing. I woke up 4 hrs later. Bummer, no free coffee for me!

Anyhoooooo, just as I was about to leave the house (the grill door was already wide ajar)... the postman came with a package!!!

Whooppeee!!! A present? For me? *obviously, the season's bug has bitten me*

It's kinda huge huh?

And it's from The Ex (in Singapore)...

Short note on the aforementioned-ex: Great guy, hyper-altruistic (seriously, he's a borderline martyr) and we dated for about 4 years (dog years, that is!). The lovestory was far from a fairytale and was fukking complicated; too much drama, not enough sex along with some psychological damage. Okay, maybe the last part is just a half-truth.

Cutting a short story into an even briefer one, we finally decided that we would scrap the romantic part and remain platonic. And for the record, we are more successful at being close friends.

He is one of the 2 ex(s) who are still on talking terms with me and does not actually pray for me to burn in eternal inferno. That's another plus-point.

Oh, did I mention his family operates a uber-huge company in the Lion City?

We last spoke like 3-4 days ago and he didn't mention anything at all, so yeah, this came as a total surprise no doubt! His signature Christmas Care Package!

And I blame him for my affinity to bakkwa. We used to always talk about these dried grilled? slices of pork (and could be very well Singapore's best EXport to the outside world, excluding Stefanie Sun or that Tammy video thingamajig few years back). Not forgetting that we always fight about where the best bakkwa comes from? Penang or Singapore?

So in line with our neverending debate on the issue, he sent over air-tight bite-sized tidbit bakkwa. I wonder if they sell this in the Bee Cheng Hiang branches around Malaysia already?

Okay D! Singapore bakkwa is more progressive!!!

Being a total photography affecionado, he included some of his 'masterpieces' in the package too. SHOW OFF! Haha... Ahhh, how I miss the Esplanade and Kallang River! =(

Ooo, there are two t-shirts too!!! Yeah, these are like all he got me from his various travels around the globe. Whatever happened to local handicrafts? LOL not complaining, a gift is a gift is a gift.

I honestly don't have a clue what this is... a name card designed for me? LOL if only I could call him and question him down to the core, but no, this guy has to go like, skiing in Siberia for the winter holidays!

Oh yes, I have to thank him as well. Haha!

As I digress, I would like to include what has kept me sane and NOT emo, what with the over-the-top stress levels.

The reason why my drives home from KL to Penang takes 7 hours! LOL... detours to the Indulgence Restaurant and Boutique Hotel (which I can never afford).

Fudge on Fudge and The Ultimate Fudge with cream and fresh strawberries!

Fudge on Fudge, served warm... simply irresistible!

Many thanks to the Diva Narcissist Princess from Ipoh for the chocolate lurrve from Ipoh!

Alrighty then. Back to mugging like a crazed student...

*cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail! cannot fail!*

Happy Mid-Week everybody! =)

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Sock Me Crazy!

Okay, I'll admit it. I have bloggers' block. And my condition is pretty severe.

But I can't help it!!! I have nothing absofukkinglutely interesting happening in my life right now!

Unless the general public can regard the 'Anatomy of the Human Head and Neck' a great read!

Studying (and other things relevant to school) is pretty much swallowing me up like a black hole. Say goodbye to life for me. I am so totally beyond screwed in my exams =(

Probably it's just me, being horned up and all, but do the paragraphs above have an underlying perverse connotation or what?

Hmm, hey I have blogged about my ties! It seemed like fun huh? Why don't I blog about my sock collection?
Yes Houston, we have contact!
FYI other than ties (and its population in my wardrobe is still increasing), I spend waaayyyy too much on buying socks. Especially dress socks! To most people, they are simply foot-garments and protective gear. (Stinky foot, GO AWAY! NEVER COME BACK PLEASE!)

These three can pay last month's electricity bill!

To me, a good pair of comfy, snuggly and haute socks just makes it a lot easier to survive a hard day (in fact, no specific day in particular!) in the wards/on campus!

No surprise there that a fag legally half-a-fashionista like me must have a collection of socks to totally rock my wardrobe. (Well undies too, but that's another story for another day!)


It can be still shocking for my himbo-self to receive compliments on my sock selection for the day, on occasion (What about my new Paul Smith shirt? These Banana Republic cufflinks?) It has happened frequently in the past few moons.

But I thank you all the same.

Outrageous? Ahem ahem.
(The one on the extreme right, with the heart, was a gift from The Husband. *swoons*)

H. H. Munro said: "His socks compelled one's attention without losing one's respect"

A lot of things can be said about a man, based on his dressing. His demeanour, estimation of his bank account and how much he loves himself. Shocking to see how many people totally lack some sock-sense. But each man to his own style. I shall leave the judgement to the fashion police.

Like hello! Isn't wearing leather shoes WITHOUT SOCKS a crime?

Stinky foot, GO AWAY! I beg you!

I love to shop for socks (along with everything else) and sock-shopping can be an economical therapeutic experience, when one is borderline-bankrupt and has to consume white congee for meals yet still craves for retail therapy!

I should stop before I blabber on about crazier sock-philosophy. Can't imagine anyone liking that, uhuh? Besides, I am le starving.

Ah, bloggers' block... If my symptoms progress to something of a worse prognosis (I can't imagine what!), I might actually resort to photographing every meal I have, cos boy! I eat a lot!

That's evidence of me committing the ultimate crime in Italian cooking - frying pasta in an aluminium wok!

From the look of the blogs, sounds like everybody is on their best worst behaviour as usual, or worst best (open to interpretation).

Toodles! =)

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Has Dating Turned 'Retail'?

It is always depressing to see the campus crowd dwindle down to a bare minimum.

Gosh, it’s like everybody in the School of Medicine has vanished to Bora-bora or Mauritius for their holidays, save for those in Year 2 and Year 3 (like me!) Even now, hardly half of my class attends the lectures anyway. I think the attendance peaked at the movie-screening

(Yes people. Watching a Hollywood blockbuster which was playing from the lecturer’s pendrive is part of our medical curriculum.)

Gah, no more junior eye-candies strutting Banana Republic jackets, Club Monaco slacks and Massimo Dutti shoes.

Reckon it to be even more saddening for Ms. Beauty Queen (who entered medical school to totally inject it with glam and fabulosity – that’s what SHE said). Who has pretty much the eagle-eye.

As we lunched over curry chee cheong fun, she let loose.

“All of us girls’ problems are related to MEN!

MENstruation. MENopause. Even that god-darn hyMEN!”

“Like totally,” was all I could blurt out in response, as I chewed on my packed lunch.

Little Bo Peep said, “I am sick of meeting Mr. Wrong.”

Honey, isn’t dating so much like shopping? You look around the boutique for something that suits your taste. If you’re lucky, you manage to find something. Try it on in the changing rooms and a few fabulous twirls in the mirror…” Ms. Beauty Queen revealed the answer to the Dating for Dummies 101!

“If you don’t like it, put back on the display then!” I butted in.

Ms. Beauty Queen went on. “So very true. We shopaholics, Hallelujah for plastic!, know how sometimes we see something we like on the hangers, and upon trying, ugghhhhh right?”

“While most people assume they understand their own tastes and style, it may not be so simple at the time. A skirt I likey so very much may not bring out my uber pretty legs.”

Little Bo Peep, always seeing a silver lining in every cloud, “Hey, one woman’s poison may be another woman’s meat!”

“Meat indeed, Little Bo Peep!” I coughed.

*smacks me really hard* She continued, “Some of my galpals met their boyfriends on The Net.”

Ms. Beauty Queen: “I was never really a firm believer in online shopping.

So has dating morphed into what-now-resembles retail? Is searching for Mr. Right an adventure similar to shopping for T-shirts?

What happens if the design you just purchased goes out-of-season?


In another un-related fashion emergency, like OMG, what on earth am I going to wear to the Graduation Awards Photoshoot tomorrow???


Oh yeah, I won ‘Himbo of the Class’ Award FYI! *beams*

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Lunch With The Barbie Dolls

God, save my mortal soul!

My life for the past few days have been mostly revolving around my 350+ lecture notes, mountainous textbooks that never seem to end, and my coffee [Oh I love my Davidoff coffee! I am more than an addict!]. I reckon my sleep-wake cycle has altered to that of a nocturnal being. What else can you call a guy who retires to bed at around 6-7am and rises to (what else?) continue on the crazy revisions from lunchtime (tea break time, if I am really drained).

It's like my day is coordinated to the UK timezone... GMT 0.00 hrs.

Plus, being grounded at home is detrimental to my mental health.

Okay, technically the last time I left my postal code zone was on Saturday for the Les Mills GX Instructors' Quarterly Workshop. And the last 'hangout' was Friday dinner in Bangsar (which somebody was NOT invited along to).

But it felt like effing forever and ever after already.

Imagine my joy when my girl-friends called me out for luncheon today. Yup, the same bunch of Barbie Dolls. Almost plastic, they are.

Okay, with more normal make-up palettes el finito.

What makes a wonderful meal is the quality of conversations, no? But we were getting dagger stares from the crowd at the restaurant. I swear we would have been exiled to the 21SX room, if there was one.

"All that I really need after a rough week is some quality girltime like this!" Natasha said.

I was flabbergasted, "Like hello? What am I doing here then? Are you implying something, Nat?"

She responded, "Oh no munchkin, I don't mean it like that. We need all the testosterone you have in you. If you were a full-fledged queen, we'd be fighting for the same guys. Haha."

Err, ya right.

"One of the primary reasons we love you is that you are gay!" Samantha disclosed.

Thank you for announcing my sexual orientation to the whole restaurant, Miss Jones.

Then it began.

"I have a question," said Eleanor. "Is it okay to dump a guy just because he is a bad kisser?"

Natasha thinks out loud, "That's awfully harsh of you, Elle!"

"I swear his tongue was all over my mouth. I could even feel him licking my teeth."

"He raped my face!" Eleanor said. "I am NEVER EVER seeing him again!"

"Yeah, the next thing you'd know is his tongue inside your stomach," said Samantha.


"Oh well, I think my boyfriend is a pretty boring guy. He's sweet and all. So I just cook-up some excuse to pick a fight with him."

You go, Stella!

"He is so sexy when he tries to make his point."

"You mean, when he makes his woody point? Haha. Otherwise, he is just a plain block of wood huh?"


"Seriously, what has happened to pool of guys here?" Samantha continues.

"It's like they have this sign on, 'DON'T DATE ME, I AM NO GOOD!' "

"Joshy's board says, 'DON'T DATE ME, I PREFER PENISES!" Natasha added.

This is what I get for taking time out to chill with these old friends - Public Advertisement as a homo manwhore.

Nat, "Whatever happened to the guys of our dreams?"

"Intelligent, but not a bookworm. Sensitive but still masculine. Sharp looks, well-dressed gentlemen who are not fat, old or a gnome," Eleanor, the new graduate-Actuarist, lists her strict criteria out.

"Elle, who do you think you are? Blair Waldorf?"

Obviously American teenage dramas is their new religion, especially for Samantha, the journalist.

Either ways, she carried on, "Those guys are most probably dating each other anyway."

Wait, did she just winked at the pretty hunkadory cashier? While adjusting her bra-strap? *faints*

Obviously excited, Eleanor went into her matchmaking mode.

"Hey, I may have someone Natasha might like. Mr. ABC. What about him?"

*pitch raised a few keys too high* Nat: "ABC? Are you kidding? He is somewhere between Mormon and Moron!"

Then it went down the road to this topic - SEX!

Sure, some of us have had it and some of us haven't, but the truth is, we're all thinking about it and clearly, the four of us are talking about it. There's the which-college/university-has-the-most-sluts, which always involves some person sleeping with a lecturer or staff. Guess what? Even in med school, it happens. LOL

Then, there's the who-would-you-do-it-with-if-you-could-do-it-with-anyone thingy kinda quiz, which almost always is a celebrity like Robert Pattinson these days.

Needless to say, we couldn't stop talking about sex. Well, the 3 horned-up Barbie Dolls couldn't. I mostly just observed. Cross my heart and hope to die!

And now that I've spilled my guts, I herewith give you permission to spill yours. Don't be shy. After all, it's anonymous right? Unless you don't want it to be. ;P

Have a kick-ass week and try to not lose or break anything that I wouldn't like lost or broken. Wink wink!

Friday, December 05, 2008

Up The Butt


Hmm, a guy like me sure loves that word. How exciting!

An exploration into an unfamiliar space, especially when it's somewhere very few people have gone before. Sometimes, an adventure can be a strong proof on how well a person has challenged his personal limits on so many levels.

After all, isn't adventure is defined as any activity comprising of risky, dangerous and uncertain experiences?

No people, I am NOT talking about my hike up Mount Kinabalu; which by the way was a life-defining moment.

Ah yes, *cue suspense musical theme* this is a note on me shoving my finger up the asshole of an elderly man.

As part of the training in Clinical Skills, we (medical students, in general) have to learn how to perform a per rectal examination... BUT ONLY ON PLASTIC MODEL BUTTS SO FAR!!!

So imagine my anxiety and fear when the General Surgeon (who FYI is kinda hot and omg is now my Idol No. 2) instructed me to do it on a middle-aged man with benign prostatic hypertrophy [basically, an enlarged prostate; a normal, non-pathological incidence].

A truly unexpected journey and adventure into the unknown alright. Where the sun don't shine.

Even explaining the whole procedure to the patient was like OMG.

"Mr. XYZ, today I am going to perform an examination on your prostate* and this requires me to insert my finger(s) into your butt anus (oops! jargon!) the place you pass motion from."

"It may be a little uncomfortable but it shouldn't cause any pain. If there's pain anytime during the procedure, please don't hesitate to stop me."

"May we begin?"

All in HOKKIEN!!!

As I gloved up and lathered rather generous amounts of KY Jelly onto the area covering my index finger, I had an internal monologue "I am going in now, so HELP ME GOD!"

I quickly inserted the said finger into his you-know-where and there it was. The warmth totally made me shiver. "Oh nooo... LET ME OUT!!!"

Right at that moment, The General Surgeon said, "Okay, Mr XYZ. We're doing good. Now, you need to squeeze your muscles as tight as you can on Joshua's finger."

And strongly he did. I WAS STUCK! There was no turning back! *Note to report: Good anal tone

"Okay okay, calm down Joshy boi. You can do this like a professional," I said to myself.

Then my himbo alter ego (unnamed as of today) popped out and responded, "Ewww. this is fukking gross. I feel violated"

However, I successfully manage to kick the abovementioned alter ego back into hiding.

Yes, I was deluded.

Finding myself stuck (in more ways than one) in such an unfathomable situation which I was abruptly thrown into, I had to remain calm and strong.

Even if it included lying to myself. "Wait, is it really MY finger inside that uncle's butt?"

All the psycho-mental babble took a grand total of approximately 3.57 seconds.

With a few swipes, feeling the rectal and prostate surface, I was done.

"Retreat with respect!"

"Exit the same way you entered, slow and steady" were among the things The General Surgeon subsequently drilled into my almond-sized brain that morning.

Once out (and then there was light!), inspect the glove for shit, blood, mucus, tissue etc. [I heard some other med schools make students SNIFF the glove *faints*]

Yup, and the novelty of the procedure went out the window right there and then.

Tell me what am I doing in med school again?

All you need is the right guy, and the right amount of lube. ;P

p.s. NO, being a sexually-active gay young man does not make me well-adapted and MOST DEFINITELY not an EXPERT at this.

p.p.s *If anyone knows what prostate is called in Malay/Tamil/Mandarin/Cantonese/Hokkien, please let me know! It will be a great help to me

p.p.p.s. All pictures featured in this blog is of the plastic model prostate examination simulator set used by my university.

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

What a Circus!

If anyone listened to early yesterday morning, one might be traumatised surprised with the 4-hour long marathon of Ms. Britney Spears' hit tunes! Like ZOMG right?

It's Britney, b*tch!

So since this is a one-in-a-lifetime experience as quoted by someone, I tagged along with my buddy, Mr. Spears (who we thought was Malaysia's No. 1 Britney fan; but was defeated with much humility to someone else) to the Malaysian Launch 'party' of Britney's sixth studio album Circus, 1 Utama organised by Sony BMG. Scheduled for worldwide release on 2 December 2008, the release of Circus coincided with Brit's 27th birthday.

Despite it being a long (with some drama mama moments) day, we set forth on this journey to Damansara with only ONE enthusiastic person a.k.a. The Driver. To get the mood going, we had the Circus album booming in the car till like, dudes on the motorcycles were giving us the WTF-look.

Still, only one person was omg excited. Still, not me.

So imagine the DISAPPOINTMENT when we got to the venue - err, why so quiet one? Only 20 people ah? And half are staff?

Okaaayyyy, I sooo totally wanted to leave after the necessary camwhoring (still, not me) to mark the date. At the very least, it was the Pop Princess's birthday!


Back! (LOL cost reduction perhaps?)

Anyways, we managed to convince Mr. Spears to join the Britney lookalike contest (Woo-hooo!) and the entourage excused ourselves to some hidden corner for some mental prep talk and urm, mini-rehearsal? HAHAHA

Kudos to the MCs/DJs for making the whole 'carnival' thingy not-so-dead.

Mr. Kenji - Malaysia's Biggest Britney Fan to date! I think he has everything with Britney in it.

Soooo, even I did go up and attempted to win something during the 'Do You Know Britney? ' Q & A session...

MC: So man, are you a Britney fan?
Joshy: No.
MC: What's that again?
Joshy: No, I am NOT a fan.
MC: What la you, go and play with your camera far far away. GO!

LoL anyways, I DID answer the question correctly and I won a CD... by Amerie. Hmm? (no yippee!)

And Mr. Spears did win lotsa lotsa lotsa prizes from the organisers... Boy, even the MCs had to ask him to STOP raising his hands!

Since the album's titled CIRCUS, there has to be a teeny weensy bit of that in the carnival right...

Oh yeah, this fella was pretty much scaring our entourage on his unicycle, like trailing one of the girls.

Oh yeah, there was also a Dance Demo by California Fitness featuring songs from the new album.

Hmm, he looks familiar?

Don't know his name but yeah, I heard he is a kinda popular gym instructor in KL.

So there's some eye candy for you readers!

It was an evening of revelations for Mr. Spears cos he finally found out that only he and Mr. Kenji are the only actual guys who are fanatic about Britney.

I mean, with normal levels of testosterone circulating and their testes still intact.

Mega-truckloads of erm... girls-stuck-in-boys'-bodies were there. They carry themselves much more femininely than some girls. *no offence!*

I kid you not.

I don't mind them. Their lives, their bodies, their choices. And I do have some effeminate friends/acquaintances somewhere. I believe they have altars at home worshipping Britney/Kylie/Madonna and maybe even, Miley these days?

Seriously, someone I know wanted to go under the knife to look like Britney (Asian version with a tan).

Wow. Uber hot pink!

The winner of the Lucky Draw (above!) - walked away with some Sony Ericsson cellphone. Right before he went into Britney mode. And danced on stage like the Pop Princess herself.

Anyhooooooo, to complete the whole Britney-mania experience, we had a nonstop replaying of Britney's hits, old and new, on the drive home. Possibly with a thousand times of Womanizer Womanizer!

'Cos you know, everybody's a Britney fan deep down. Blek!

Monday, December 01, 2008

You Mean The Animal?

Okay, just a erm... a short story (ala cerpen) about a random fella in my batch.

He shall be referred to as MMM (Macho-Macho Man!) cos he sings that song sometimes while walking along. Swt!

It begins like any typical PBL* (Plenty of Bull* and Lameness) session.

The facilitator releases the clinical case triggers and the group discusses what is happening to the patient and blablabla what issues and topics to be covered in our "Self-Directed Learning" module...

The patient presented with pain, swelling and redness of the right big toe. Complaints include poor quality of sleep and frequently wakes up in the middle of the night due to severe pain. He is a retired man and has been an alcoholic for over 20 years. He has recently stopped consuming red meat and internal organs as he noticed that the painful attacks occur mostly after taking such foods.

OKAY! Long story, but the version above has been summarised already... ;P

So during the brainstorming session,

Mr. Gigantic: Could this be gout?
Mr. Gigantic: Whaaattttt? (along with everybody else in the group)
MMM: You know, the farm animal. It has horns, and eats grass and mengembek
(bleats in English?)
Ms. Futsal: That's a GOAT lah... Moron!


Okay. End of Story!

Hmm... In conjunction with today being World AIDS Day, I wore the T-Shirt depicted below!!! Like a walking pseudo-awareness billboard.

Alrighty then, hope everybody has a CUN-TASTIC start to the first week of the last month of a great year. Oh what a rollercoaster ride it has been!


Saturday, November 29, 2008

Bottom Top @ KLPac

Poster picture (from KLPac website)

Woohoooo!!! I went to catch this 'phenomenal' play on Thursday - its Opening Night! The seats were practically overfilling!

I have a feeling that the audience mostly consisted of gay guys (with family and friends) or the family and friends of the people behind this ingenious work of theatre! Notwithstanding, were the shrieking QUEENS behind us with their highpitched reflexes to anything humourously homo.

"When I heard about the play, immediately I thought of YOU and YOUR MUM!"
- Faghag

I went with a faghag (sorta, almost; cos she'd really hate being referred to a hag). I think she was more excited than moi. While waiting at the cafe, little gay meself finetuned her gaydar as per request.

So on with the story.

Dato' Faridah Merican (who makes her much-awaited return to the stage) plays Bertha, a middle-aged woman preparing for her wedding with her late-20s gay son, Melvin carried effortlessly & wonderfully by Mark Beau de Silva [pretty twinky ;P], who is also the playwright.

Yup, just two characters played by two immensely talented powerhouses of Malaysian theatre.

As mother and son chit chat about their respective romantic histories and compare men, one cannot help but to be immersed into the conversations.

Bertha suggests potential guys for Melvin to bring to the wedding dinner at Overseas Restaurant. While the latter shares and educates his lovely mother on the intricacies of being "different" - how things aren't as simple as it may seem.

Saunas. Parks (not for picnic obviously *winks*) Picking up guys.

Bottom or Top?

Many moments of top-notch humour got everyone bawling with laughter. I am pretty sure I heard somebody snort too! LoL

"Hormones drop. Tetek also drop"

Bravo! Brilliant!

Me and Faghag then scurried off to Imbi after the show ended for a very much late dinner and stuffed ourselves silly. Now, tummy also drop.

We are now fat. =(

Visit the KLPac Website for more info on this play! Some publicity press releases are available there too!